When you concentrate on your own life, you're learning how to rely on yourself again to be cheerful and not on your boyfriend. This kind of approach won't help you in trying to get him back.

When your ex starts getting in touch with you after the break up, she wants to keep the lines of communication open for a specific reason. Usually that reason is to keep you hanging around, just in case she wishes to change her mind about breaking up with you. Knowing where you are and what you're doing makes her feel safe and comfortable, especially if she knows you still love her and would take her back at a moment's notice.

If her friends kept asking you about how you've been and if you've been seeing someone, then it's likely they're doing the interrogations for her. In other words, your ex is trying to determine if you're still available. It could be because she's trying to figure out how to get you back in her life as well.

Real friends will also tell you if winning your ex boyfriend back isn't such a good idea after all, and will move heaven and earth to help you reunite with him if they can see that he's right for for you.

You are desperate because you think that you might be losing the man you love forever. This feeling is caused because he has dumped you. So, to get him back, you have to dump him and make him feel rejected. You might think that would be impossible, but it can be quite simple. Male psychology teaches that men want what the feel they can't have. So, you have to stop throwing yourself at him.

It is vital important that you take a true break from your relationship. To be honest I thought that the best way to get my girlfriend back was showing her how much I really care about her before it was too late. But then I figured it out that my emotions were raw. Lucky enough I didn't call or visit her. When you contact her short after the break-up do not forget that you will say things that are untrue and that will hurt her. On the other hand she will see you like a stalker and you immediately lose points. I allowed myself to have a cooling of period of about four weeks. During that time I was not allowed to talk to her. Executing this brad browning no contact rule wasn't only necessary for me but also to win her back. Let's face it someone can not miss you if you don't give her/him enough time to miss you.

Sooner or later, your ex is not going to be able to take the strain anymore, and will give you a call, just to hear your voice again. Of course, you know exactly what is going on, so don't give in to your emotions just yet.

Finally, write how the breakup will make you stronger and how there is always a positive that comes from a negative. Write a final goodbye to your ex. Your letter can be from a half a page to a novel. It's different for everyone.

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